Men are not like vodka. If you keep them on ice they go bad.
You don’t need to reject him but do not send mixed messages to keep him on standby. He will start to resent you. Attention from a man that you don’t value, doesn’t feel flattering for long.
The rule of thumb is, don’t choose the one who makes you choose. If the romantic relationship is abusive or destructive, that’s a different matter. From what you’ve described, this is just about jealousy. Try to talk to your friend. Explain that your relationship with her is important to you. She may just need reassurance. Sometimes when a new relationship begins, it becomes the main focus. Schedule some friend time for just the two of you. She’ll probably calm down. If she keeps pushing the issue, you don’t have to choose. She will have made the choice for you.
Aren’t you modern? Let me think about this. How can you tell him that you’d like him to report directly to the bedroom without annoying you by talking and not ruin your relationship?
Hmm, this is a tough one.
Hire him or fire him. He is your service provider. The two of you have nothing other than compatible body parts.
The only advice I have for you is shape up. Your attitude stinks.