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Olga Addresses Selfishness

Ask Olga


I'm not sure what to do about a persistent man. I don't want to date him right now but I don't want to reject him. I really like the attention. Claire

Dear Claire

Men are not like vodka. If you keep them on ice they go bad.

You don’t need to reject him but do not send mixed messages to keep him on standby. He will start to resent you. Attention from a man that you don’t value, doesn’t feel flattering for long.



I have been dating a man that I really like. I think that this could be a long term relationship. My friend doesn't like him though and she said that I need to choose which relationship I want to keep. I don't want to loose either one of them. What should I do? - Rita

Dear Rita

The rule of thumb is, don’t choose the one who makes you choose. If the romantic relationship is abusive or destructive, that’s a different matter. From what you’ve described, this is just about jealousy. Try to talk to your friend. Explain that your relationship with her is important to you. She may just need reassurance. Sometimes when a new relationship begins, it becomes the main focus. Schedule some friend time for just the two of you. She’ll probably calm down. If she keeps pushing the issue, you don’t have to choose. She will have made the choice for you.



I am in a sticky situation. I love the guy that I've been seeing, until he talks. Now he wants to spend more time together. How can I tell him that I only want him as a bedroom buddy without ruining what we have? - Maria

Dear Maria

Aren’t you modern? Let me think about this. How can you tell him that you’d like him to report directly to the bedroom without annoying you by talking and not ruin your relationship?

Hmm, this is a tough one.


Hire him or fire him. He is your service provider. The two of you have nothing other than compatible body parts.

The only advice I have for you is shape up. Your attitude stinks.


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The Scamper

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